Hearth & Home
A message from Frenetic Monk as he summers in his cottage in the Cotswolds:
Check it out, man. See the picture on the left? That's seaweed on the roof. Seaweed, dude. SEAWEED. Don't believe me? Check out the Website where I found the photo:
Free photos there, tons of them. The site rocks, man, ROCKS. Anyway, look at the title on the photo page. "Old farmhouse with roof of seaweed." See? So there.
And speaking of "hearth," imagine trying to live in my Winter Palace (see sepia photo, stage-left).
Can you imagine the a/c bills if John Edwards, John Kerry, or Al Gore lived in that place? I'm a monk though, dude. I don't even know what electrcity is. The Amish, they ain't got nothing on me.
GUEST LECTURER: Father Blackbeard
And lo, behold, but unto under this, there was afraid, because they brought him forth a mind-numbing "stimulus" bill, red, all his wife, and prosper my life; and Haran. And Moses was not Joseph. And Mizraim begat Nancy Pelois of Adam who lived shoeless and toothless after she was banished forever from the House Of The Sane. And Herod was Harry Reid. And they said, I have made a son: and daughters. And forsooth but Obama, alas, he is not the man you thought he would be, now is he. But as the Goode Booke sayeth, Adah the hail, make provision for the slow decline of your civilization, except thou finish it was beautiful, you sad bunch of freakin', well, whatever, that night of Bozrah reigned in the thing was ended, they spake unto Moses, you cretinous sack of self-obsessed hissy-fitting narcissistics, who went forth purple, and all the God remembered Noah, after the bread, separation of Church and State, separation of morality and society, naboo but Ahmed beseech the thou, everybody free to do whatever they damned-well please, in swains bucket le hail the dry ice doth gave givens the alms forswagger not the bunting, how's all that been working for you so far, eh (as they say in Canada).
This is my regular life.
The photo on the right was taken just moments after I won the New York State lottery. As you can see, my faithful companion, Sterno, was simply reflecting my mood at the time. So excited was I, that the news was delivered to my fellow monks thusly: Θυμικά ου το αν πω επιδρά τροχιά. Έμπνευση ρεαλισμό όλο προ αντίληψη. Να το νέες ήρωα τάση προς. Γι συγγένεια πραγμάτων κανονικού σε επιδιώκει έν κοινωνικά. Υπό τραγουδιών εξω προσωπικών ενώ αυτοποίηση έλα. Ομοίωμα ως σφυγμός ατ έκθετος.
Their joy knew no bounds.
The humble abode on the right is that where I am most relaxed, most at 
ease, most likely to pick up a Karaoke microphone, most likely to go completely ga-ga and vote for an um, uh, ah, duh, TelePrompTer like Obama, who will take away our waffle irons, make us wear undergarments, tax our monasteries out of existence, and prevent us forever from serving on board the Enterprise. "Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetuer adipiscing elit."
And that's all I have to say about that...
Now we move on to the visible portion of your web page. Begin by replacing the word "Header" with the name of your website. As before, you can do this simply by clicking somewhere in the word "Header". A blinking text cursor will appear. This text cursor behaves exactly the way the cursor behaves in a normal word processing program like Office or Word. You can move it with your arrow keys as well as use the DEL and backspace keys to delete characters.
Once you're done with replacing the "Main Content" header, proceed to replace the "Lorem ipsum dolor" (etc) gibberish. Just click somewhere in the top line, delete them, and type your own words. Typing and editing of text in Dreamweaver works more or less the same as it does under a wordprocessor. If you need to create new paragraphs, hit the ENTER (Windows) or Return key (Mac).
The "H2 level heading" subtitle is there merely to show you that you can have subtitles in your documents as well. Replace it, along with the text below with whatever you want.